The Secret Diary of (Fake) Ron Littlefield: I Finally Got Rid of Billy Blades

First of all, let me take a moment to express my gratitude to the fine folks at Chattarati for inviting me to write on their weblog. You know, it’s not easy being Mayor here in the Boulder of the East. Our city is facing numerous challenges, but I’m confident we’ll overcome them all—as long as I’m in office. But I digress.

As we look forward to celebrating our great nation’s independence (will I see you at Pops in the Park?), I am also celebrating my own personal Independence Day. You see, I finally got rid of that annoying Billy Blades!

Billy and his little web site have been a thorn in my side since I took office, but no more. A little “incentive” inspired one of his buddies to cough up his secret identity. You should have seen the look on his face when I showed up at his door with two of Chattanooga’s finest. I haven’t laughed so hard since I approved saw those “Ann Coulter is an Athiest” flyers during the last campaign!

You’re going to be shocked when I reveal Billy’s true identity, but I’m not ready to do that just yet. I want to savor this moment of triumph.

With Billy Blades out of the picture, I hereby declare myself: Best. Mayor. Ever.

This post is satire. It was not written by the real Ron Littlefield. Did we really have to say that?